♥ Princessa's Royal Diary ♥ - Royalty has never been so PINK!

Recently, I've come to realise that I dream a lot, awake and asleep. They say one only truly rest if one does not dream. I guess I haven't had much rest for the past xx years - I dream almost every night (and every day).

Been owing this entry to a certain individual for a couple of days now. I accidentally on purpose told him about the dream and somewhat mentioned that he was in it. Truth be told, he was in it, so were a million other people.

I've been exhausted lately, I'm guessing it's my period. Anyway, I was lazy to BBM him the story and said I'd blog about it. So... I'm blogging about it.

Okay, you know how people tend to change as they grow older - physically and mentally. Well, some people change more in physical terms and others, mentality. The best case scenario is when they excel in both. The worst case scenario... well... I'm sure you'd be able to figure that one out.

I guess for the past 6-7 months I haven't really been getting to know the person for who he really is. My impression kinda remained where it was about 10 years ago. It's flawed really, way flawed. And lately, all this flaws are starting to surface.

(I'm going off point. Let's get back to the dream and leave the justification for it, after.)

I'm guessing it is a couple of years later from present day (I'm not saying how many years exactly just so you can't guess my age), when we're all pretty much settled down - in terms of career mainly.

Well, if you wanna classify this as a nightmare, theoretically you could. A 3x-year-old lady, single, is not exactly the future I was hoping for. But hey, at least I'm pretty well to do. That's a major plus, I think.

So anyway, unlike present day, we don't meet up as much. In a good month we probably see each other... twice? Every time I see him, he is with a new girl. Not exactly how I pictured him to be when we were that much older. But like I said... I was wrong?

The dream was pretty much like a screen play. There were replays, pauses, playbacks, etc. It was like as though I was living in a drama series. No seriously, it was.

I was suppose to meet him at the wine bar for drinks that very night (in my dream), together with D and his wife (present day girlfriend that I have not met) that is. As usual, he came with his new girl, Kiki if not mistaken. And as usual, the age of the ladies around him seemingly remains unchanged, despite him getting older.

It's always nice to hang out with people that much younger than you. It kinda makes you feel young yourself. But... after "so many years" and the age gap increases... it was really started to get uncomfortable. I'm no Samantha Jones. There is no way I'd be caught dead wearing something that the Hannah Montena of the future wears. I suspect I'd have a very close friend that is a plastic surgeon (cause I constantly visit his clinic), but still... you know what I mean.

I love clubbing and stuff, but I love my quiet moments too. That night happened to be a night that I wanted to just lay back and chill with my friends. But no... even though it was MY DREAM, I think deep down I somewhat hate myself.

Out of nowhere, drama found its way to our table. And by drama, I meant his other girlfriend. As she approached our table, I started rehearsing what I was going to tell her in my head. Before she opened her mouth and create a scene, I stood up, stepped forward, blocked her path, and started my "argument".

My first line went something like, "Hey, this is really not the place and the time to do this."

The trick is to stop them before they say their first sentence. Girls tend to get more and more agitated as they speak, especially when they are upset. The louder the environment is, the worst it gets.

So, I somewhat lead her out of the bar to somewhere quieter. There, I let her outburst. I really dislike arguing with girlfriends, or girls in general. Being one myself, I know how unreasonable they get, especially the younger ones.

I guess I've been in this kind of situation so many times until even when I'm asleep... it plays in my head like a routine. The part that I couldn't understand was why the hell am I settling his problems for him? Seriously?!

OMG Sabrina, haven't you had enough of solving men's problems for them? Wasn't that ass a good example of why you should just watch and laugh? Tsk. Even in my dream I'm such a loser.

And the "flashbacks" hit me. One situation after another, for the past couple of years. Strangely I keep ending myself in situations I detest. Yes, I made a lot of girlfriends along the way... but still...

Despite my supposed busy schedule, I seem to have quie a bit of time to listen to the girls whine and bitch. And no, in my dream I wasn't a psychiatrist.

The words, "I owe you big time" and "I'm sorry" were used so many times until it had no meaning anymore. But also because of its frequency, I kinda got used to the whole routine.

Our "friendship" was pretty weird. It wasn't virtual, it was tele-communicated (I couldn't think of another word). Like all good friends, we "talk" or rather type, practically everyday. But like I said, we meet up like twice in a good month. That is adulthood. Sad but true.

This dream felt a lot like life. I couldn't fly, I didn't have super powers... I was just me. I'm not really sure if it's a reflection of my fears or just a stupid dream that I should just forget about.

I wanna do well in my career, I wanna have me-time and I wanna have my girlfriends... but I also wanna...

We can't have the best of both worlds. I know that. I'm not expecting the perfect relationship, but I definitely don't want the closet thing to a relationship is helping another solve theirs.

Anyway, the dream ended in the worst way you can imagine. No one lived happily ever after (except for D and his wife), the friend I imagine as the perfect guy turned out to be a complete and utter playboy, and... I COULDN'T FLY! Tsk.

I use to dream a lot about castles, ponies and stuff like that. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED!? Reality checks on a daily basis is waaay too exhausting. Gimme a break Sandman!